Prawnographer

The Crustacean Society can even offer you the 'The Journal of Crustacean Biology' what more could you want.

Prawn crackers has an item on research that proves that snapping shrimp are not the noisiest creature in the shallow ocean, with an inate ability to intefere with Submarine Sonar (thousands were trained in the Archangel by the Russians during the cold war, so they were clearly wasting their time very much along the lines of American trained mine hunting dolphins who have seen the opportunity for freedom wheneve deployed for real and taken full advantage).

The ever lovely Delia Online gives you all you need to know about shelling prawns, but more importantly to the true prawnographer will inform you that 'The term prawn covers a multitude of varieties, many of them from warm foreign waters where they grow fast and often large. Even when unfrozen, these lack the flavour of our own, native fat juicy prawns. Scampi is the Italian name for what we used to call Dublin Bay prawns, not in fact prawns at all but a tiny member of the lobster family. Just to confuse matters, what we call prawns the Americans call shrimps. But our tiny shrimps are almost a national delicacy when potted in the traditional, Lancashire way with melted butter and spices. One authority suggests that to appreciate the flavour of potted shrimps, they should be gently warmed until the butter just begins to flow'.

Personally I'd recommend a twelve bore if you aim to pot shrimp, and them scampi are best approached with snares. A word of warning on crayfish, never smile at a trapped crayfish, if they get scared they'll stampede.

fom the pen of Robyn Hitchcock via the ever wonderful Soft Boys comes the frankly bizarre Where are the Prawns? a track that first got me interested in the tiny crustacean fellas.


Baby doll, you know your hair
Shines like ink when you're not here
You left before I got here
So how do you know I'm late?
Who's gonna tell me when you
Gonna be on the menu?

Where are the prawns?
Down by the sea
Where are the prawns?
Down by the sea
Where are the prawns?

Cookie pie, the waters rise
Above your legs, beneath your eyes
Already the clouds are drownin'
Even the stars are damp
I'll be awake and dreaming
All of us could go screaming

Where are the prawns?
Down by the sea
Where are the prawns?
Down by the sea
Sea sea sea sea
Sea sea sea sea
Sea sea sea sea
Sea sea sea sea
Sea sea sea se

A first prawny post in Dano.